Happiness

My definition of happiness has gone on quite a trip in life. Now, it stands where it started.


When I was a child, I remember happiness being defined as family outings. My late father was an active participant in our development. Even though he was working hard to make ends meet, whenever he could steal a day off from work, it would either be spent on family picnics, or family lunches or even family television watching sessions. He made sure that he would catch up on us during these times. Was there anything new in school? Any favourite subject? Any interesting guy? The conversation would revolve around the lives of his children. My sisters and I used to look forward to his off days. I remember those days brought a lot of happiness to my innocent life.


Then, teenage years arrived. I was thrown into a roller coaster journey of self exploration and discovery. Happiness took the form of extrinsic achievement.When I was finally able to afford a blouse that everyone else had bought months ago, I was over the moon. I remember being so grateful to God for answering my month long prayer to open my father's heart so that he would let me go to a friend's sixteenth birthday party. The ultimate was that orgasmic elation when the guy I had been panting for for years finally smiled at me!


When adulthood set in, situations were less dramatic. Happiness was achieved through responsible decisions and actions: my first contribution to the family economy; my first trip to Europe from my own salary; my pursuit for higher studies from my own savings; my first grand purchase - my very own flat.

Later on, when I began to fall in love, happiness was all about the external effects. Life revolved around relationships, a string of them. The calls, the affirmation of love, the gifts when they arrived, the quarrels and make-ups, his very existence whoever "his" was at various points in time.


And now? I am married with a wonderful daughter. My definition of happiness is the time spent with my family. The evenings at the beach while Misha struggled with her pink ball. The family dinner at East Coast Marina Cove as Misha struggled with her cutlery. The family television sessions with Misha in the middle, struggling to stay awake.